Wimbledon Rulez, ofcourse with more Rules

How many times have we seen the British crowd on one side of the stadium, sitting pretty in the stands of Lords and rejoicing in a very orderly manner with no emotions but just appreciating the game of Cricket and the skill of a player no matter who they extend their support for.

On the other side, we have this half naked ugly Barmy Army showing off their uglier Beer belly with a mug of beer in their hands and cheering their heart out even when Freddie is hit for a six by a tail end Australian Batsmen. That Cricket for you.

On the contrary, the behaviourial science is strictly followed in the All England Lawn tennis and Croquet club during the tennis-holy sesaon of the year. I was reading the times of India today and was surprised to see more behaviourial rules for the spectators.

The one that caught my attention is "Do not cheer for a net chord or for a double fault". I appreciate the essence of the rule that manifests that one should not cheer for a point won by a player which he did not earn through his display of skill or which he earned by his opponent's misfortune.

I stopped reading the article and my focus of attention immediately went to the following amorphic what-ifs?

What if - the same rule is extended to all unforced errors, which also in a way follws suite of the above mentioned rule. Now, do the spectators know the game well enough to immediately categorize the point as either a winner or an unforced error and then decide to cheer or be quiet? More vague thoughts - may be a special referee, like the line umpire (i'll call him as the "Cheer decider") will be deployed who will judge the point won by a player as either a "winner" or an "unforced error" and will signal to the crowd. The crowd will eagerly wait for his decision and then burst to cheer.

What if - the Cheer decider makes a mistake? Can the chair umpire overrule? In which case, the situation becomes funny. Cheer decider says "Cheer" and the crowds start to cheer and then the chair umpire overrules. All wimbledon crowd shift from a huge uproar to pin drop silence within a fraction of a second. Imagine the other way too ;-)

What if - the player can challenge the decision like the way they challenge line calls and he is proved right that it is indeed a point won and not an unforced error. Really don't want to illustrate with an example for this scenerio.

What if - the Championship point of the Gentlemen's final of Wimbledon end up in a net chord. Will the entire crowd stay quiet and walk out of the stands. Can't imagine that:-)

What if - this rule is implemented in India and in Cricket for a Hit wicket or run out effected in the non striker's end when the batsman hits the ball and the bowler gets a finger to it and the non striker is out of crease when the ball crashes the stumps. Will the entire crowd of Eden garden's stay quiet, especially when the fielding team is India? Can't keep imagining..have to get back to work :-(

If you have more "What ifs" post as comment.

Eazy Dreamz

Dreams and ambitions are becoming easy for each one of us as days pass by. I saw the IMAX adventure documentary on a bunch of people climbing mount Everest a couple of years back. Although am not into any sort of adventures like climbing mount Everest on my own and suffer from all the cramps and pneumonia, i did wonder if i will ever see such natural wonders. Am sure my thoughts are same as someone else's too.

I read the new paper today and the headlines read ..."China is planning to make a highway to the peak of Mount Everest". Soon India will and the documentary showing all the efforts put in by the bunch of people to climb mount everest will become this century's biggest joke in near future.

Mind reading....made very easy by this strip :-)

Couldn't stop laughing after reading this funny strip. Although its funny, i bet thats the reality ;-). Am sure each one of you whoz either married or having girl friend (or emotionally acquainted with a girl) will relate this strip to their own (recent) past :-)

...calling it quits.

Yes. I'm calling it quits after about 23 years. I've decided to retire from following all forms of cricket. It was a wonderful career of 23 years of following what is perceived as a religion in India. It all started just after India's victory over West indies way back in the 1983 Prudential World cup. I was then a 6 year old kid when I first started following cricket. The first ever cricket match that i saw was India vs Australia held in Australia and I still remember India led by Kapil were playing in sky blue with a single yellow stripe in their t-shirts. My dad started explaining me about how the game is played and the rules and the countries that played and was showing me who Srikanth was and who Gavaskar was and who Binny was and what are 'slips' and what is 'long on' and what is 'extra cover' and what is 'thrid man' and so on and that is how it all started for me 23 years ago.
I rolled on the sand when India won against New Zealand later that year. I cried when Miandad hit a six of Chetan Sharma on the last ball in Sharjah. Since then I've followed every match and every series till date. I've cut classes in school. I've stood on compound walls to peep into the neighbour's TV sets. I've attached my ears to the feebly audible radio commentary owned by a sweet vendor outside my school. The commentary was in hindi and i don't even know a single word in hindi, but still waited for the occasional "chaar run" and the "pehtharene shots". I've waited in long queues outside the stadium at 10 A.M just to watch India play at 2:30 in the noon after eluding lathi charges from police. I've been to the Lords to see the real Prudential cup on display that Kapil Dev lifted in 1983. I need a giga byte of memory to write all testimonies about my "cricket-fan-career". And today as i type this sentence, Irish team will be taking a short flight to Guyana and our dear Indian team will be boarding the long flight from the Carribean and now i don't care where they land and what they do from now on.